Thursday, 31 July 2008

Get thee to a nunnery

Welcome Novice Strumpet.

I see that Sister Chastity has bestowed the 10" commandments upon you. Learn them well as the path to enlightenment is littered with many false trails that lead to the sullying of young wenches. Beware of the boybands as they are indeed the devil's own creation. As is the devil's mode of tranport; under no circumstances be lured by lusture of a Prius. It is wrong and a mortal sin to consider it eco friendly. The devil fools you with such lies.

The sisterhood takes their vows of pervedom to our Lord very seriously and there are mandatory calls to perve at the 40" altar when our beloved chooses to broadcast his greatness to the great unwashed. We also scan tinterweb on a daily basis looking for visions or text about our beloved and his greatness. At present we have learnt that people are making a pilgrimage to Shakeyland to see our Lord in action performing the great words of 'ol Shakey as Hammy. Such is his presence that many have flocked to the doors in hope of being granted an audience with our beloved, and I believe that some have had the holy armpit stuffed into their face - such joy!

Sister Chastity will be departing to seek an audience next week and we shall perve until her safe return to the gutter with news of our Lord - and hopefully a signed programme. In November the sisterhood will collectively gather to worship at the thrust stage in Shakeyland. The mere thought of being before our love gladdens my heart. I have also learnt that a Federation Starfleet Captain of some repute is treading alongside our Lord, tis indeed an audience of intergalactic greatness.

Novice Strumpet - get thee to a nunnery and pray with your very soul that you stay true to your vocation.

Let us pray sisters.

Tennant x


Sister Chastity said...


Well said Sister.

I have to giggle though as I have done some research on Hammy and apparantly in Elizabethan times a "nunnery" could be a slang term for a brothel!

Sister Shagwell said...

Very true. I am certain our Love would like to be fast tracked to said brothel. Maybe it evolved to BBC Welsh Wales?