Monday, 31 March 2008

Monday Matins

Greetings Sisters! Oh how we worshipped the (Time)Lord 10" this weekend and were spoiled by the miraculous pics of our (Time)Lord in his fetching grey undercrackers on the FNP.

But Hallelujua!! This 'coming' *ahem* weekend promises to provide the Sisters of Pervitude with more holy and blessed visions of our (Time)Lord - Praise be!!! This Friday he shallt appear on the Wossy show and we shall perform our Friday thudfest, ahem, I mean worship in front of our telly screens! And then on Saturday - our beloved returns to our screens in DW!!

Need we ask for more Sisters? I think not - however, I shall spend the coming evenings in prayer that Wossy shall ask our (Time)Lord to flash those holy relics at us again! I ask us all to spend some time in contemplation of the 10" bulging out of those undercrackers over the next few days and then hope our prayers are answered come Fridays worship.

Praise be to the 10"


Sunday, 30 March 2008

All my bags are packed and I'm ready to go...


I bid you farewell and I leave our wet and windy shores for sunnier climes. I am glad that we attended Friday worship as the look and the word of our (time) Lord *praise be* was mighty fine!

Oh! were the heavens and the universe joyously thanked at the sight of our Lord, tied to a bed, in all his grey undercracker glory for the masses to see. I must admit dear sisters that at this point I did have many inpure thoughts toward the 10" Sisters, I pray that you also had similar experiences? Dis you not once imagine closing the door behind you, locking it. Then working time and time again to "pleasure" our (Time) Lord *praise be*?

While I have been recounting this experience another vision has appeared on the 40" altar. It was set in a car park and the vision appeared and calmed the troubled soul. This was not foreseen over on the oracle. I fear that they are losing their faculties.

While I am gone I trust you shall go about your duties and spread the perve? I shall return next Sunday evening from which I shall go straight to the 40" altar and worship. I shall give great thanks if the heethan souls of criticdoom do actually seek enlightenment this season and remember that our beloved spreads the word to a family audience. He only seeks the inner perve of the female of the species or those that may choose to travel on the other bus.

Until the 6th...Go and perve at our beloved.


Friday, 28 March 2008

Friday Night Perving

Sisters, I have been busy in my devotion to our (Time) Lord *Praise be* and have spent the morning on t'interweb looking for news of our beloved as he came amongst the horny flock to bestow his greatness upon them. I hear that he has selflessly allowed the good people from Ch4 to tie him to a bed in his undercrackers to torment a fellow devotee of our (Time) Lord *Praise be* How this poor unfortunate soul contained herself in close proximity to the 10" and the (Time) Lord *praise be* is yet to be witnessed. I pray that her perverted soul has been saved and that she will one day be able to leave the padded cell that she was placed in after such a sight. (jammy bitch!)

I have also learnt that much lampooning of the father will be taking place as well as the poor boys who Proclaim. There is also some merriment in the Q&A section. How our beloved handled this is to be marvelled at. Whomever has ruffled his hair does greatly impress me, as this is something I also aspire to upon my audience with our (Time) Lord. *Praise be*

As well as my work on the web I have prepared the 40" altar and have cleaned it to shine. The communal wine is chilling and the chocolate is broken. Before service I shall install new Duracell batteries into the sonic.

I look forward to seeing you evening worship.


Thursday, 27 March 2008

Parting is such sweet sorrow


I depart this morning for the Far East (well Suffolk!) to spread the word of our Lord to the peasants of that fair county.

Before I do I thought I should post the scans of the vision which landed on my doorstep yesterday.

I'm not sure if the T'interweb is available in that far off land. If not this will be my last post till Tuesday next week!

*sings* Onward Tennant Soldiers marching as to the Time War......

"Take me to your leader. I've always wanted to say that!"

Wednesday, 26 March 2008

I have had a vision!

Hail sisters

I cannot let this day pass without letting the world know of the vision of our Lord which dropped through my letterbox this morning.

In gratitude for an act of charity for Headway, I received one of the limited number of cards personally signed by our Lord *praise be his name*. Fortune was with me, as I indisposed on a training course, my daughter (a future sister in waiting if I can convert her) signed for the wondrous gift that the Lord bestowed on me.

I am looking forward to this evening when I can spend some solitary worshipping time in front of this vision with only my Sonic for company!

I will continue to be inspired by this great gift for the rest of today and well into the future...

My thoughts go out to you sisters in the hope that you all receive anything you may also be expecting today.


Tuesday, 25 March 2008

Even Snog

Another day is ending dear Sisters, and we are once again gathered before our (time) Lord. *praise be*
I pray you have had a most bountiful day? I shall venture out into the night once more to preach the good word to those who are yet to seek the enlightenment that is 10".
Sisters, I have a confession and I hope you will here me? I have declared unholy war upon the Toymota Penis. It is with great sorrow that I have declared thisterrible act but my conscience guided me to do so. This unfortunate hybrid is now calling itself a "bandwagon". The recent press have advertised this fact, and yet those that are of superior intelligence are buying such a pile of sh*te. Sisters, I implore you not to make such a terrible mistake as that of our (time) Lord. *praise be* I feel that the Welsh air has in some way fuddled his most magnificent mind, as I am sure if he had his faculties about him at the time of purchase he would have considered another hybrid. Those misguided "luvvies" residing in Londoom have also fallen prey, and while I may not be surprised by this fact as many do not possess the intellect as that of our (time) Lord *praise be* I am disapointed that he has also jumped on the luvvie bandwagon! Shame on you my Lord!
Sisters, let us pray that one day he will see the error of his ways (or I'm torching the bloody car!) I will see you in the orderly queue for the communal snogging of the flock.
Go in peace and perve at the (time) Lord.

Monday, 24 March 2008

Lord of all Sexiness


I feel we need a hymn for this most holy Monday. I have chosen one of my favourites and i hope to hear your voices praising the 10" on high this evening.

(Time) Lord of sexiness, (Time) Lord, greatest lover,

Whose body, ever skinny, we would like to uncover,

Be there at our waking, and give us, we pray,

Your kiss on our lips, (Time) Lord, at the break of the day.

(Time) Lord of all eagerness, (Time) Lord of the swiveling hips,

Whose long hands are skilled on the buttons and zips,

Be there in our daydreams, and give us, we pray,

Your tongue in our mouths, (Time) Lord, at the noon of the day.

(Time) Lord of all Scottishness, (Time) Lord of all grace,

Your hands swift to finger, your arms to embrace,

Be there at our coming, and give us, we pray,

Your mouth on our breasts, (Time) Lord, at the eve of the day.

(Time) Lord of all gutterness, (Time) Lord of all charm,

Whose voice is most heavenly, with the 10” in our palm,

Be there at our sleeping, and give us, we pray,

Your dick in our pussy, (Time) Lord, anytime of the day.

Sunday, 23 March 2008

He is Risen...

Sisters - on this most wonderful of days I am glad to see that our (Time) Lord *praise be upon his name* has risen. I have proof.
Go in peace and perve.

Bless you.

Saturday, 22 March 2008

Saturday Sermon

Greetings my fellow sisters. I have just partaken in my private saturday sermon of the Lord 10". And good Lord - it was good. I have also bein musing on what the Lords sermon will be in Stratford upon Avon when we descend upon it in November - methinks a fic may be forthcoming!

Alas i will not be available for tonights worship - I must welcome some weary travellers to my abode and will do my utmost to convert the masses into the Cult of Tennantism.

The Communal Wine we had last night is also playing havoc with my worshipping skills at present so i shall now give myself 10 lashes of the sonic for penance. (I quite look forward to that actually!)

So farewell for now and I shall join you both in service to the Lord tomorrow - Sunday mass should be good this week!!

Praise be to the 10"!!

Friday, 21 March 2008

A Very Good Friday...

Sisters, I have spent a most fruitful day worshipping at the 40" altar. I looked upon our (Time) Lord *Priase be upon his name* in a tux as he battled selflessly to save the 6 billion people upon the earth as well as everyone onboard the Titanic. However, even he, as magnificent as he is, could not save Astrid. Oh dear! Am I bovvered? (whoops wrong assistant)

After afternoon worship I have now logged upon the t'interweb and will avail myself to scavv images of the stud muffin. Please watch this space as I may have good news later on when we come together for evening worship.....

Praise be upon the 10".

Thursday, 20 March 2008

Sisters, indeed this is good news for the faithful. Our (Time) Lord is with us once more. I unfortunately will not witness his return to the nation as I will be exploring the Time And Relative Dimentions in Sliema.

I will don rubber bondage outfit as a pennance.

Praise be!

Many thanks to Sister Chastity for that joyous news!! I shall be joining my fellow Sister and other Gutter Girls to watch our Lord perform on television on April 5th!

I shall be polishing up my sonic 'screw'driver for the occasion!! Hopefully i shall experience yet another epiphany!!

Our Lord returneth to us!!

Sisters Rejoice. Our (time) Lord returns to us…

Most welcome news today. According to that most august of bodies, the BBC, our (time) Lord *praise be to him* returns to our living rooms via the magic of the TV screens on Saturday 5 April. I trust we will all be worshiping his magnificence bar Sister Virtue - who is being truly punished for taking her holiday that week.

Wednesday, 19 March 2008

Oh my!

Sisters, get down on your knees and pray, for the (Time) Lord has come amongst us. May we give thanks at his bounty. (Can I have dark chocolate on mine?)

A sermon to the unbelievers will be broadcast to the nation on 4 April at 10.35pm. Jonathon Toss will be conducting perves, along with Mizz Tate, who will be serving at the altar. (Tighter trousers on the 10" please Catherine!).

A virgin will also be sacrificed. Hang on, there are no virgins on this blogg. Sisters, we need to canvas the public and see if someone will loan us their virginity... Why I am asking this I do not know as I have yet to witness any sort of virginal sacrifice on Jonathon Toss. Watch this space...

Go in peace and perve at the (Time) Lord.


Wednesday Worship

Glory be to the Teninch

Thanks to my sisters for the various texts and emails regarding our Lord, David Tennant. I too, like Sister Chastity, have had a rather crap day and need some solitary adoration of our Lord and Master - Hail to the Teninch.

As i pray to this Idol of all Idols, i grasp the teninch tightly - then slowly praise the stiffness. This is surely the greatest of all gifts from our Lord. But......wait......ITS A MIRACLE!!!!! The great gift grows!!!!! HALLELUJAH!!!!

It throbs in my hand - the Lord is communing with me through his teninch. It tells me faster.......faster....... I do what I am commanded to do. Mana from Heaven!!!!! The Lord delivereth unto me - milk and honey from his loins!!!!! I am surely blessed.

Oh - praise be to the Teninch!!!! This sister can now go perve with her fellow sisters in the Gutter now - I think i just had an epiphany!!


Evening Service of Thanksgiving

Wednesday evening.

Sisters I call you to evening service of thanksgiving for another day of lovely Tennanty thoughts.

Thanks be to Sister Virtue for her text which I received this afternoon. Her impure thoughts certainly improved my otherwise disastrous day. I barely had time to even consider the 10” at all between the hours of 9am and 4pm and for that I am truly repentant.

I tried to make up for this lack of diligence to my duty between 4pm and 5pm by perving Photobucket and Youtube rather than writing up the meeting minutes as I was being paid to do!!

As part of my repentance, I have logged in to the Gutter early and posted where I can to entertain and enlighten the Gutter Girls. I am currently searching for some stubble pics to reward Sister Virtue for her dedication and devotion to the lord today.

I promise to do better tomorrow…. or may David *praise be his name* beat me to within an inch of my life with his weapon of mass orgasm.

Sister Chastity

Our Tenninch...

Our 10", who art in tight jeans
Hallowed be thy strain
Thy kingdom's dark
thou shall be loved
on t'interweb and on telly
Give us this day our daily perve
as we forgive those who drive Toymota penis's
And deliver us from the skoda
For thine is a 10"
that holds great power and glory
Forever and ever and ever

Tuesday, 18 March 2008

"David with Me" - A prayer

David with me, David before me,David behind me
David in me,David beneath me,David above me
David on my right, David on my left
David where I lie, David where i sit, David where i rise
Lust in the heart of David who thinks of me
Lust in the mouth of David as he goes down on me
Desire in his eyes when he sees me
Moans in his ear as he hears me
Salivation is of the Tennant
Salivation is of the Teninch
May your salivation,David,be always for me


Bedtime Prayer

All Sisters must recite the following prayer every night upon retiring to our beds:

Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray for David to kiss me deep
And so I come with screams and moans
I pray for David to jump my bones

Sisters of Pervitude

Sisters of Pervitude are a splinter group from the Cult of Tennantism. We are devoted in our daily service to the Tenninch.

Come back soon to see daily prayers and services for forgiveness!!