Monday 25 May 2009

Bank Holiday Blogging


Sisters and Acolytes


So another bank holiday has come and gone and the Lord has bestowed gifts upon the sisterhood.

On Saturday our (Time) Lord *praise be his name and Teninch* surprised a DW fan with an unscheduled appearance on the Tardis set just to remind everyone that it is still HIS TARDIS until 2010. The sisters' hearts were a-racing when he poked his head through the door and laid a hand on the fortunate's shoulder. We notice that the spacehopper T shirt seems to be in favour at the moment. Maybe our Lord is pining for Derren Brown?

As an added bonus to set us up for returning to the world of work tomorrow, the BBC sneaked a programme narrated by the Lord into the schedules this evening. It was by chance that this Sister, keen on hearing the news of dirty deeds from the Palace of Westminster, remained on the flagship channel one to hear the Lord's words of wisdom. He was explaining about doctors and everest and pulmonary odema or something. I didnt pay much attention to the images of rugged men wrapped in anoraks, I was marvelling at how the Lord can make near death experiences seem very sexy! He should narrate more BBC programmes, or read the news, or be the voice of the speaking clock.... Ok, sorry getting a little carried away and hysterical now!

So, it would have been a very acceptable bank holibobs (we even got some sunshine) if it were not for a certain Child causing trouble. And I'm not talking about the Princess of Darkness for a change. No I am talking about The Child of the Devil, popping up and spoiling the fun for everyone. Firstly she tags along on a boys night out in Cardiff. There is John happily shaking his booty for all to see, being supported from the balcony by best mate David and who is seen loitering in the dark? Yes, you guessed it, the blonde bimbo herself, looking less than impressed at the Lord making a fool of himself in a Team Barrowman T shirt and waving like a mad fanboi when the spotlight picks him out of the crowd!

As if this were not enough, we then hear news that she is to *star* in a new Doctor Who animated adventure with our Time Lord. As Jenny? I hear you asking. No, Jenny is clearly been left behind in time and space, abandoned, unloved, unwanted *snigger snigger* The Child is portraying a character called Cassie Rice - sounds like number 56 from my local chinese restuarant! Is this her swan-song? Will the Lord finally realise that she is leaching the life, the career and (as evidence from the Baftas would indicate) the awards from Him?

Sisters and Acolytes the time has come to pray for the Lord like you have never prayed before. Spatulas in hand I call to you to kneel before the 40" altar and chant with me

*Ditch the Child*
*Ditch the Child*
*Ditch the Child*

Lord the Sisters are waiting for you .....

Tennant

3 comments:

Carole said...

I shall pray so hard the he 'ditches the Child',i will have carpet burn on my knees..such pain i shall endure for thy Lord to see the error of his ways!
On another note...said 'job' will keep her in colouring books and crayons for a while..including juice and biscuits...'tis a heart-breaking thought that the Lord and Child will be 'playing' with one another in the studio.
I once again point our fellow Sisters and Acolytes to the 10th Commandment!

Sister Shagwell said...

*Ditch the Child*
*Ditch the Child*
*Ditch the Child*
...Has our Lord bin-bagged her yet???

Bugger.

Sister, I have prayed hard, but I am perplexed as to why our beloved is still infatuated with the adolescent witch? It is obvious that he has yet to experience the delights of a more, experienced WOMAN, and not those of a wanton wench. Grrrr.

I took great delight to spy visions of pure lust upon the 40" altar this last holibob weekend. The Lord looked as dashing and thudworthy as always. While I pondered at this bounty I was later informed that our Lord had taken said child wench out to see JB - has our love lost his senses?!?!? I was in the company of JB earlier that week, and he was, at times, rude! He used rude words! This is no place to take a child and I fear I have no option to report him to social services as he is a safeguarding nightmare to the young and impressionable.

News has also reached the Sisters that the child will be making her Miss Maple Syrup debut in hamburger-a- go-go land. The Sisters agree that the ep must be so poor they could not show it to decent folk in Blighty.

I shall continue to pray that our Lord will one day wake up and ditch the bit*h

Tennant x

Acolyte Mia said...

Oh Sisters and Acolytes!!! Let it be heard across the land and oceans...our Lord (praise his name and 10") has signed to reprise his role (with the entire cast) as Hamlet for BBC2!!! Let us now pray for DVD such that we in the colonies might feast our eyes on the red T again! (and, as for the child, her job might also fund a dictionary so she can understand all those big words...)