Wednesday, 14 October 2009

Has the Lord declared a period of Purdah?


Dear Sisters


It seems that the Lord has gone into hiding this week as there have been no sightings of Him *praise be his name and ten-inch* since the Sisters commented on his freeloading and frequent attendance at Premieres on a school night.


There is talk that He may be in LALAland once again - racking up those debits against his carbon credits for driving a Toymota Penis.


There has also been a rumour that he will be starring with the Editor, Simon Pegg as a Victorian BodySnatcher. Leaves room for plenty of double entendres n'est-ce pas? I will make the most obvious comment - he can snatch my body (or body my snatch) anytime he likes!


So this is a short Blog this week as we await His return - maybe he will join the Scousers at the showing of the SJA adventures? Sister S - perhaps you can enlighten us?


On a final note, I would like to thank the Anonymous Troll - Not only am I its favourite apparantly (and you have NO idea of the talent that I truly possess) but since it chose to spew its bile on our pages we have increased our followers. As they say in The Business - all publicity is good publicity!!!


Tennant xxx


16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sister Chastity...

I am sorry to hear about your laptop having issues.. ( methinks it was that troll's fault! hehe..) and now everything is resolved... ( I read your twitter page, but I haven't joined twitter..)

I am so hoping to hear confirmation from The Lord about him being in Burke and Hare... even though Landis said he was in it... That type of movie is right up my alley!

Keep up the good work, Sister... your blogs make me smile...

Sallee

Anonymous said...

The lad still in LA, and due to shoot a film in Scotland. Surely the child did not leave the elf for two weeks during the school year to travel with him? I'm thinking the rumour from the last blog must be smoke and mirrors, he almost seems to be running from her.

Sister Shagwell said...

Sisters and Acolytes

I have done the necessary and spoken to the powers that be at aunty beeb. Alas, they are not allowing women of child bearing age into the auditorium unless they bring along a small annoying thing - A Child! (I bet you thought I was going to say something else?) Yup, you have to take a child with you.

Will the Lord see fit to grace the good people at the "centre of the universe"? - Professor Phil Redmonds words, not mine. If there is a hint of his 10"ness coming to the North West once more I shall hunt him down.

Now I must away as the clan have gathered from the frozen north.

Acolyte Jealousy said...

Dearest Sisters, Fellow Acolytes, and beloved followers of our Lord. It may have been a slow news week for our Lord but I have been charged with encouraging all to keep faith by receiving TWO holy visions this week.

The first saw Him as an English teacher (and in a brown suit no less) scolding me for my lack of effort with the assignment. I can only interpret this as Him being upset with me for my lapse in worship. He wasn't scolding the other students; all female I noticed. Since then I have been worshiping fervently and was blessed last night with another vision.

This time He called me to Him with a "but soft what light through yonder window breaks...". We exchanged the lines and I must have done well for I was blessed repeatedly with the Holy Teninch.

He is planning His next move. We must have patience and faith. He will be more glorious when we see Him next.

~Acolyte Jealousy

Acolyte McSkinny said...

The lowly Acolyte is suffering from so little visions of the Lord.
Is he still in Lala land?...on holibobs with the Child?...We seek him here,we seek him there,we seek him everywhere!
The book of Face has the Child absent for 14 days!
The Sisterhood awaits you Lord!

Anonymous said...

Ahh I love that you think they aren't all the same person...bless! Although you probably know that already..wink ;) x Love your lovable troll xx

Anonymous said...

Prediction for next blog...child is bad mother. Lad taking child to adventure park. House of horrors=taking child back to her 'home'. Now that I've just said it all do you think you could spare us all the drivel? Oh and Bev/janine...you continue to disappoint as always...shame. x ps. You should see the shit people are saying about you! Bloody funny. Laughing stocks doesn't even cover it. Big kissez to you all x

Sister Chastity said...

Dear Troll

Bored now so please retire back to your cave on WDW and then you wont need to read our *drivel* anymore. I am happy to be entertaining the window-lickers of the world.

Goodbye *waves*

Anonymous said...

oh sweetie you aren't even entertaining them but adorable that you think you are! ;0 I will see you all soon you precious wannabe GM's...Love to you all xTrollx (waves back)

Acolyte McSkinny said...

Why do people have to resort to undermining a blog?
Nasty troll.

Sister Shagwell said...

LMFAO...Anon, you do amuse me. I have wanted to be many things in life, but never Genetically Modified. Says alot about our absent part-time mother.

As for the prediction.... A responsible mother would not be as quick in leaving her offspring to go swanning around LA theme parks with her boyfriend. A responsible mother would wait for the half term holiday and take their child with them. Then again, what can you expect from a child with a child?

I do like WDW... it is such fun to mix it up with the misguided window lickers.

PS. Anon - your true self is emerging from your latest rant. A few errors in that last one. I'm not talking about the 'Kissez' either.

Shame. You were doing so well.

Anonymous said...

I'm curious why do you all hate GM and have to be vile about her?

Sarah said...

*sigh*

This poor anon really doesn't get it...
Why can't horrible trolls like that stay on places like WDW, and share their own hatred against humanity with people who appreciate it...
And she thinks she's witty, poor little thing...

Sisters, i think this is a test the lord is sending us. He wants to know if we can show some compassion for intellectually challenged little trolls. Let's be brave :)

Anonymous said...

Erm, I've only just found this blog! I think its brilliant! I just dont have an account to use, otherwise I would join it. There is nothing wrong with asking an innocent question is there? I'm just wondering if you hate her so much why not just avoid mentioning her? There's nothing wrong with asking that is there? I don't like her but if I don't like someone I avoid mentioning them instead of doing what you do. Is it wrong to be curious then?

Acolyte Jealousy said...

Dear above Anon.
No offense was meant to you. We are being tested through the torment of an Anon Troll. The question about GM is perfectly reasonable. The answer lies in my name. :) We all want to be with "the good Doctor" and are sad that he is with her. The pety remarks just make us feel good about ourselves. :) For my part, I revel in them because my hubby told me he thought she was hot while we were watching that particular Doctor Who episode. I laughed and told him he could have her if I got the Doctor. Hubby agreed, plans are in the works. ;)

Anonymous said...

Thank you Acolyte Jealousy for explaining it to me. :)