Sunday 28 November 2010

The Holidays are Coming



Dear Sisters


So the Coca-Cola advertisement returneth to 40" altars around the land signalling that the Festive Season is now upon us. This year the celebrations in the Sisterhood will be somewhat muted by the lack of our Time Lord *praise be his name and Ten-inch* adorning our televisual equipment. One acolyte has spotted that the Lord is to be found in the company of naughty schoolgirls in the lead up to the Big Event, but I fear that a Christmas Day without the Lord Ten-inch to perve after the turkey, stuffing and xmas pud is just not the same.


The Lord is of course currently in the country of  the Cheryl "wye-eye pet" Cole  filming something entertaining about a bunch of Man U players getting iced in Munich. I am sure that he fits in very well with the Geordies and is enjoying a few bottles of Newkey Brown with the lads of the Toon Army. We are awaiting our first images of the Lord with a 50's haircut...


Of course, the Lord wouldnt be the Lord Ten-inch if he wasnt busy doing some very odd things in the name of chasing the almighty dollar. He can be seen each week on the Chris *give me some eye bleach now* Moyles Quiz Show attempting to foil his fellow celebrities with some extremely dodgy impressions. Fine Actor though the Lord undoubtably is, he is no John Culshaw when it comes to impressions. Nevertheless, this tacky show has led to yet another fabulous sound-bite. Who could possibly resist our Lord impersonating the legend that is Tom *I'm from Wales you know* Jones and uttering the phrase "suck my Sex Trumpet" - There are some things that are worth the TV Licence Fee all on their own!


So, November has been a quiet month for the Sisterhood: little news and little to perve and as we move into the final weeks of 2010 we predict that:
1) the Kiddies will be getting excited about the prospect that the Lord has been buying diamonds in the North (where no doubt they are cheaper) and will go down on bended knee on the day when Christ and the Child celebrate their birthdays; and
2) there will be a weeping and a wailing on boxing day when the kiddies wake up to find the world hasn't changed and the Lord is still a commitment-phobe


An eagle-eyed Acolyte spotted a tweet a few days ago (see earlier blog comments) from a sleb who is likely to be an acquaintance, if not a friend, of the Lord's which I have posted a pic of below. I wonder if indeed Christian O'Connell has unleashed a beast by introducing the Lord to the power of the Bird that Tweets and he is now using that same medium to toy with his fans...intriguing.....


Keep the Faith Sisters, the Lord's time will come again and he will Rise from the ashes of the BBC schedules like a Phoenix rising from the fires of Hell.


Tennant  xx



If you can't read the Tweet it says
"@monstroso And does anyone know if there's any truth in the rumour that David Tennant's partner is expecting a baby?"


13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Its all rather bizarre . I knew this sort of celeb style gossip would come about with the Lord being attached to the wannabe family. He has only himself to blame. No doubt she is preggers another accident from the child is hard to believe but probably the lord is not moving on fast enough (or her career). I doubt its planned because if so they would have set up home first . Unfortunately a babe ties the Lord to Londoom and the wannabees forever. bye bye glittering career hello a life of quiz shows

Anonymous said...

There is no chance that she is pregnant. The papers would have found out and it's not like they are hiding themselves away. It's rubbish I'm sure, Sarah, Kent.

Anonymous said...

Another great blog! I saw that tweet sisters and also thought it odd.
I hope the Lord is wearing lots of thermals whilst working in the snow.
Bet he wishes he had followed the Hollywood dream and could now be working in La La land on a big movie nice and warm instead of flogging himself for the bbc whilst trying to dig himself a pathway in the snow to reach the smug one in time for Xmas. Keeps him away from the dreaded panel shows though
He does though always look his happiest and hottest whilst working
Juliet x

Anonymous said...

I'm guessing no one twittered a response to Charlie's question? Or not one that most can read, anyway.

Anonymous said...

Love the blog
The Lord hath been busy once again this week. Back home for charity and then a social date at press night for his mate Catherine. The pics of the charity event show him looking more devine than ever.
Then he turned up on tv looking very debonnaire.
Marvellous sight.
Slightly panicking about no further work on the horizon has he backed out of the Hobbit hope not

Anonymous said...

I too cannae understand why, if the rumour is true, the gossip and news media are not all over the story. [Are those persons who claim to have seen Child + Bump all mischief makers, or deluded, or merely mistaken?] UNLESS, which god and all the angels and saints forefend, the story is true and is promised as an exclusive to Hello or similar, post-Event.
No, NO. Surely not. I would hate the sleb tackiness of that so very much.
Does the media even work like this? For the sake of argument, would the Mail or ER back off from publishing photos of DT and GM at the theatre last week because Hello, say, had secured an 'exclusive' story of an event that hasnae yet occurred?
I do not fear for the Lord's glittering career - that will still happen. But I do fear.
And yes, the only reason he'd do those silly quiz shows is because they probably pay well. He is a thrifty Celt, working in an unpredictable market. A quid, as we say, is after all a quid and not to be sneezed at.

Sophie said...

If he has any hopes for a nice, normal family life out of the spotlight, then I'm afraid he has very much picked the wrong people to become involved with.

Anonymous said...

The reason being if the pregnant thing is true, the reason the press probably hasn't printed it is probably because there is no visual proof and they are remarkably talented at avoiding being photographed if they wish to be.

Sophie said...

Well, the press haven't had any trouble photographing him with her in the past. They could hang around his house, if they so wished, as they have done in the past.
And as for being talented in avoiding being photographed. I wouldn't say 'they'. I think it is he, who is talented in that respect. He is the one in demand after all, not her. And she has always been very happy to give details of her personal life in the past. Anyway, if you're a couple, who cares if a press photo occurs when you're at a press event? No big deal. It never bothered him with Sophia. As for not wanting it to give away whether she is pregnant, well then she shouldn't have happily posed for the press photo at Legally Blonde then should she?

Anonymous said...

Sophie you are basing that on nothing. I for one like her and don't care what family she comes from. She makes him happy and that's all I care about. I think this blog is funny and too many of you take it too seriously. You don't have to be a gm hater to be a sisters lover. Mae

Anonymous said...

I am pretty much convinced she will be pregnant. There is the legally blonde pic and the pics of her hiding her tum (but of course wanting to draw attention to it) He will be thrilled but this is not the best time for him at all to be having children and I feel like the child and her family and well and truly played him.
I cant see a beautiful future in this for him at all with that family but he is old to look after himself.
God knows why the press arent interested but maybe they are just waiting for her to get further along before announcing. He is well thought of by everyone so in this case maybe they are being respectful

Acolyte Martha said...

I don't think the no-press thing is because they are so brilliant to avoid being photographed. At most they don't get photographed together by entering and leaving separately and walking down the street apart. The press know where they both live and have no compunction about spending nights lying outside their houses with a camera to get a story. The tabs are well aware of this rumour, if she had an undeniable bump it would be in the news already. Going to press nights, concerts in massive arenas, and events where there are likely to be tons of DW fans (JB's concert and CT's play) is hardly hiding and out of all the fans who saw him/them only the WDW poster claim she looked pregnant. They already lied about seeing her with an obvious bump last September. Either she isn't pregnant or she isn't showing yet and the WDW poster is full of it claiming she's waddling around at plays and concerts looking ready to drop.

IF it is true and what he wants every blessing to them. Them not marrying or setting up home first, and him working non-stop far away from home for the past nine months (and his comment on COC's show about only being back till Christmas) is not indicative of a happy expectant family IMO.

Anonymous said...

very well put acolyte Martha
Juliet x